Bel Far Niente

Pursuit of pleasure. As Elizabeth Gilbert discusses in Eat, Pray, Love, Americans don't know how to pursue pleasure. We're too busy working. And when it is time to relax it's either in a zombie-like state of distress as we recover from our crazy work lives or we fill guilty and believe that we should be doing something. We go on vacation and we have to be distracted. We need something to entertain us. And if we can't find something, we retreat to that instinctive work ethic that is such a prominent part of our culture. As Gilbert discovers though, the Italians know how to relax. In fact they've got it down to an art; an art they actually call bel far niente, translated as "the beauty of doing nothing".

Now I don't have a drop of Italian in me, and maybe it's because I'm still a college student who's outlook on work and relaxation hasn't been tainted by the real world yet, but I'm pretty sure I'm a master when it comes to bel far niente. Now I will admit that I go get restless at some points. It was earlier this summer that I was whining about missing school and wishing that I was in England. But I don't think that was out of being unable to relax. In fact I'm pretty sure it was the result of relaxing too much. I needed something to liven up my life again.

Fortunately my wish was granted and I spent my six weeks in England, and now here I am, regretting that I ever wished that school was starting up, something I predicted in that sad little blog entry about boredom. And so now that classes are really around the corner, this weekend really is my last weekend of summer and enjoying it to the fullest.

So I came home. Well, actually I came home because I had a rescheduled eye appointment (the original one I missed because my England stay extended by an additional three days thanks to Continental), but I was happy to return home on Wednesday night. And I'm not going to lie. Even though my boyfriend wants me back at Ball State tomorrow and I've never hesitated to see him, this time I'm not ready to retreat back to a city nicknamed Funcie, in which the only "fun" part about it is really all my amazing Ball State friends. I'd rather stay here and enjoy Fairfield a little more. I was barely here this summer. Today I took a dip in the pool and realized I probably have only been in it for no more than 10 times this summer, if that even. I got to go everywhere this summer and yet I feel like I missed out on so much. I normally spend about a month in New York. This summer it was less than 2 weeks. I am normally in Fairfield a whole lot. But due to my England excursion, I'm feeling like I will have an early onset of homesickness this semester.

Don't take this as real complaining though. I loved this summer. One of the best summers of my life. But if anyone knows me, it's just as my Mom always states, I'm never completely happy. There's always something more I want or felt I should've experienced, but I can't have it all.

So I had to accept that time here in my hometown was short this time around. That's okay because yesterday and today I took full advantage of my mini-vacation here at home. Most of my friends from the field are at school, and so here I am on my own. With the exception of running my sister around, I haven't gone further than my backyard. Today I laid out in the sun with absolutely nothing running through my mind. I wasn't reading. I didn't even need my Ipod. Just me, the sounds of nature in my backyard, and the sun. It was relaxing. It was bliss. It was bel far niente.

After this year I'll soon be entering the real work force, the American work force that demands working long hours with short breaks and in some jobs or situations sacrificing weekends. You know what's really sad to me? People have accepted this. They've accepted being workaholics and have all us young college students believing that this is the way of the real world and that we "better get use to it". Well, I have one response to this: humph!! How dare you tell me to make work my life, to give up enjoying life without money or progression running through my mind. Besides, it's not the "real world", it's just America.

I love America but I think right now this is my biggest grievance with this country. We work because we're expected to and we believe this is okay. I seriously want to know who came up with this brilliant idea that working the way America works is enjoyable or desirable. Cause I'm not feeling it. I like that I can relax and not feel antsy. And I hope that once my career really does start, I'll still know how to live the life of bel far niente. And I hope that my generation will be the same way.