Little Black Sunfire

Sometimes I just need to take a step back and count my blessings.

Life has been going particularly well for me recently. With the exception of no success on the job front, life this school year is off to a good start. I am enjoying my classes and I have high expectations to do well in all of them. As of right now there is not one that I dread going to and none are pushing me towards the insanity of boredom just yet (not even econ247, though that's probably because I actually really enjoy learning about economics and financial stuff. I get it from my dad.) I am living off campus, thank goodness, and by that have avoided the overwhelming, crazy, stressful, yet often fun work that comes with being an RA. It's nice to not have to worry about others. It's nice to be able to eat breakfast at noon and not have to return to my hall at 7pm for duty. It's also nice being able to sleep over in other people's houses without having to ask for the night off.

With that said, I absolutely love (for right now at least) living in my house with my housemates. I like having the comfort of a kitchen that I don't need a key to, a living room, and living next to people that I actually like. But with living in a house I've forgotten one important little detail I wish I had put more thought into before now: transporation.

I don't know what I was thinking would happen this school year. I think I had this hope that my parents, particularly my dad, would see the need I have for my car and let me keep it. I guess I was also hoping that I could successfully persuade him into letting me keep it if I offered to pay for everything; gas, insurance, oil changes, any repairs, etc. Nope. Hasn't budged. I even looked up the car details on blue kelley and found the price the car would be worth, offering to pay for it (as if I had the money to actually do that). He told me he wouldn't make me pay for even what the car is worth (he seems to think it's a lot less) but he wasn't letting me take it. The car is in his name, it belongs to him. Game over.

And it was honestly pretty stupid of me to think that I could actually win, considering all the times in the past I have begged, literally begged for the car. I guess this time around my chances were higher since I am living off-campus and the need would be greater.

But sadly no. Come next week, I'll be in Muncie, and the only transportation I have will be the little old one gear road bike that was my mom's, until I can find a nicer bike for under $200. That and rollerblades. Thank goodness for being a runner, I at least know how to walk fast.

If I were writing this blog just a few days ago, I would go on and on, and on, about how wrong this is of my parents. I would throw myself a pity party and rant about how my friends whose parents have given them or bought them cars should consider themselves spoiled and lucky. I know this because I vented almost all of that in a stupid facebook status.

Which prompted my sister, who is also in college and car-less, to respond. She didn't say this bluntly, but she implied that I was being selfish little twat who needed to give her parents a little more respect for all they have given me instead of complaining about the one thing they refuse. Well really she just implied the selfish part; the rest was my conscious telling me to wake the hell up.

And they (my sister and jimminy cricket) were right. I was being selfish. I've always been selfish when it comes to that little black sunfire. Ever since my dad bought it in 1996 I have been yearning for it to be mine. When I was little I used to crawl in the back seat and just sit there. No particularl reason, I just loved being in that car. I dreamed of the day I would learn to drive it. I was lucky in high school, because it did eventually become mine. It was mine this past summer. It's been mine for trips to the grocery store to the 6.5 hour drive to New York. I just want it to be mine now and forever.

It's not fair for me to ask of it from my parents. Yes, there are only 2 drivers living at home now and they already have 2 cars. But, my sister is in the process of getting her license, the 2 other cars are both vans that aren't always reliable, and because my dad works in Cincinnati, he gets better gas mileage with the sunfire. Not to mention that with my sister and I being at college without cars, my dad gets an insurance discount. For me to have the car here, in which I'd probably only use it once a week, would be a waste.

So after cooling down and coming to my senses that I don't have to have my car, this is what I did think about:

The incredible amount of things my parents have sacrificed for me over the past 21 years. From clothes to tuition, from a camera for a major that I didn't pursue, to this nice little computer that my dad could've used for himself. From letting me borrow the car on countless road trips to depositing money in my bank account when it was needed the most (which happened very recently). To think that I expected one more thing of my parents after everything that they've offered is a little disheartening.

So even though I'll be relying on the MITS, my boyfriend, friends, and bike for future transportation, at least I know that when I really do need something, my parents will do whatever it takes to help. And that means a lot more to me than that little black sunfire.